SWOT, Galactica, Rain, Reign, Cat Stevens, Case for Faith

I have been really awful at keeping my blog up-to-date.  Here are some random thoughts from the last couple of day.

Our church hired a consultant to come in and do a SWOT analysis.  For those of you who have never done one of these, SWOT stands for Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats.  Basically it is a guided brainstorming session to access where your organization (in this case our church) is and where they are going.  As I have said in the past, I am in a fairly unique situation at my current church.  I enjoy church and I look forward to going.  I have not always felt that way.  Anyway, they were going through the litany of strengths and my mind started to drift.  Never ask me to brainstorm.  I cannot control my storm.

So I started reflecting on my life.  I started doing my personal SWOT.  I got through my strengths without much reflection.  Then I got to my weaknesses.  It really dawned on me that my life is at drift.  I have put the ole brain in neutral.  I know the source of this, it is stress. 

I am pretty good at facing stressful situations head on.  I do what I have to do and then “I move on.”  But really that is a load of crap.  I don’t move on at all.  I get through the stress and then I retreat from the world.  I have come to the conclusion that for the most part, I have given up.  I have stopped exercising.  I have put on weight.  I binge eat.  I have stopped participating in church and life.  I come home from work exhausted.  I constantly watch TV or play video games.  I go to bed and wake up exhausted again.

My first inclination was to run back to my doctor and ask for more drugs.  But really that is the easy way out.  I am not sure what I need to do yet, but I recognize that I cannot continue moving in the rut I have carved for myself.  If things continue the way they are going, I will be dead before I am 45.  I write this in the hope that if I don’t get “with it,” I will read this in a few weeks and feel guilty…or one of you will beat me about the head and neck.  Enough said.

I watched Galactica Friday night, while snacking. J I love the show, but they have taken a really political turn.  I am an escapist when it comes to entertainment.  The latest twists in the storyline are too close to reality.  I don’t need my science fiction to remind me how much our current political situation sucks.  I already obsess over it.

It rained again this weekend.  Which means for the second week in a row, we had to nix the whole Cox’s farm thing.  I would go in the rain, but I am worried that Ethan might catch a cold, which in our case always cascades out of control.  I am having Jenn do anti-rain dances in the yard.  I would describe the dance, but it is obscene.

Speaking of rain, I am up to her (I am gesturing behind the keyboard), with the reign of our current sovereign.  Wake me in two years.

I have recently started listening to Cat Stevens, aka Ramsey Youssef.  I am a bit confused.  From his lyrics, I could see him becoming a monk.  I don’t see the Muslim connection.  Anyway, I really like his stuff.  Right now my favorite song is his version of Morning Has Broken. 

I co led my first small group meeting on A Case for Faith.  It has been a long time since I have led a group.  I think I did OK, but I am not sure the group knew what to do with me.  I have an odd style (can you imagine) and it takes some getting used to.  My co leader has had this group alone for several years.  I think they wanted me to just shut up and let him lead.  But I think they will warm up to me in a few weeks.  I just take getting used to.

Well enough of my ramblings.  Peace out.

By Ben Posted in Life

5 comments on “SWOT, Galactica, Rain, Reign, Cat Stevens, Case for Faith

  1. Sounds like you had a wake up call. God’s doing that with me, in a way, as well. Sometimes our old ways of coping are not the best God has. For me good ol’ self-flagellation (mentally, not physically) is the scourge of the day. I know He’ll show you what to do; in fact, I’ll pray it.

  2. lyrics by Eleanor Farjeon

    Morning has broken, like the first morning
    Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird
    Praise for the singing, praise for the morning
    Praise for the springing fresh from the world

    Sweet the rain’s new fall, sunlit from heaven
    Like the first dewfall, on the first grass
    Praise for the sweetness of the wet garden
    Sprung in completeness where his feet pass

    Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning
    Born of the one light, Eden saw play
    Praise with elation, praise every morning
    God’s recreation of the new day

    Remember to see each day this way…to hear each voice this way…to live each moment this way…

    and “god” will forever be recognized in your heart.

    In that, we are always new
    In that, we are always perfect…

    even while “adrift”.


  3. I wish I had some perky words of encouragement… “Don’t just stand there, DO something!” comes to mind, but somehow I think mantras won’t necessarily get you anywhere!

    Ben, you’ve got to be one of the greatest guys I’ve ever known…and for this reason, do not sell yourself short! You will get there – even if it takes a while. God will continue to beckon you even if every part of you is apathetic.

    …but don’t be apathetic for too long because you dead before 45 would suck horribly!


  4. You are my idol. I wish I could play video games and binge eat. This morning I worked out for the fourth time this week alone. My wife has decided that I will get in shape even if it kills me. I’m pretty sure I’d rather just die at 45. It’s a ripe old age!

    So anyway, if I have to suffer, you gotta suffer. Get off your duff and join a gym. Now. Or we will have to do an intervention, and believe me, that will NOT be pretty.

  5. It took a friend to help me. For me it was important to go to the doctor and get some medication to help start the process. In the 6 weeks since I began, I have noticed a great difference in my outlook on life, relationships and God. My advice is simple…do something. Only you know yourself, maybe you should start at the doctor he/she could give you some helpful advice on starting exercise, diet and medication. One thing I have noticed as of late is how closely tied my spiritual life and my physical life are. I never thought about it, but it’s true. Too often I have thought of it as being two separate entities…it’s not.

    This is rambling…have a great day!

Comments encouraged!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s