OK, so Jenn and I both got $50 Borders gift certificates for Christmas.  I just got my books 5 books yesterday.  Jenn looked through the bag and said, “Oooo, these are good.  I can read them too.”  I said OK, and then looked at her purchases.  Every last one of them was some sort of Jane Austin frilly lady in lace sitting by a lake and talking about her feelings while having her hair braided books.  I said this was no fair.  She could read all my books but I wouldn’t want to touch any of hers.  She responded that I needed to be more open minded.  I told her if I were any more open minded I would sprout ovaries.  I pointed out that my books were not particularly masculine but hers were definitely ultra feminine.

I am ranting.  But since I am always right I thought I would share my wisdom with the world.  Love me.

BTW…here is a list of the books I bought.

Gathering Blue
The Blind Assassin
Tuesdays with Morrie: An Old Man, a Young Man, and Life\’s Greatest Lesson

By Ben Posted in Life

7 comments on “Kvetching

  1. ROFL…Someone telling you that you have to me more open-minded!!! That is almost as funny as me smashing my thumb with the toilet lid!

  2. Why ovaries? Are you trying to say that women are more open-minded than men? May I suggest a slightly different list for next time.
    Anything by Louis L’amour
    Build your own off road buggy
    Bodies we’ve buried : inside the National Forensic Academy, the world’s top CSI training school
    Shooter’s Bible
    Jean Davidson’s Harley-Davidson family album
    The Campaigns of World War II day by day

    As to “you need to be more open minded” what you really need to do is read one of hers (just skim it and get the main point, a few characters, and some significant events) and then discuss the book with her. Tell her things like, “oh I just cried when that happened”, or “I was so moved by that part, it just touched me”. Add a little effeminate touch to your voice when you say these things. She will never tell you to read one of her books again. Worked great for me.

  3. Oh and for Tim
    Cobblers by Camille Lefoll
    Cobblers, Crisps, and Deep-Dish Pies (American Baking Classics)
    Cobblers, Crumbles, & Crisps and Other Old-Fashioned Fruit Desserts
    250 Best Cobblers, Custards, Cupcakes, Bread Puddings & More
    And most importantly —
    The Cobbler Crusade: Main Courses and Desserts : Bringing an Old-Fashioned Dish to Modern Cooks

  4. OMG, Ben, it does look like her!!!

    Kevin I am making note for next I go to Barnes & Nooble.

    And yes I do read books! (Comic books count, right?)

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