\”Thank you for calling Hell. We care about your call. Someone will be with you within the
Millennia.\” â€¦up town girlâ€¦you\’ve been living in your uptown world…
I just ended a 2 hour Verizon tech support rage. Luckily no puppies were harmed and my DSL is up and running again.
Last night I watched an hour long documentary on cemeteries. How sad I fall into the demographic of people who watch cemetery documentaries. I think the documentary was produced solely for me and maybe Craig.
I do not want to be buried. First of all I hate wearing suits. Second, what a waste, I basically have to wait for the planet to explode for the matter that is me to get reused. I think I would make excellent compost. Then at least I could be useful to a tree.
We have a saying at work, â€œOnly death will release you from PowerFAIDS.â€ I kid about it all the time. But I think they took me seriously. They installed defibulators on every floor. I can see it now; I double over in pain, fall to the ground, see the light followed by a big zap. They tell me to get off the floor and get back to work. Hopefully I will have the presence of mind to soil myself. At least then I can take the rest of the day off.